I’ve spent a lot of time in my life watching nature. Aside from it’s beauty and magnificence, I find it is filled with lessons, many of which I point out in my book The Gifted Storyteller, and others which I blog about.
I recently posted a video on Facebook regarding relationships. One of the key lessons I stated was that in a relationship, when there’s an argument, when they go high, you go low. In other words, if s/he screams or gets loud, it’s important for you to pause, and respond in a low calm voice.
Doing the opposite does a few things:
- De-escalates the situation
- Gives you time to pause, breathe and respond, rather than react
- Follows a law of nature
The natural state of magnets is they either attract or repel one another. When the two North sides of a magnet are facing one another, they repel each other; there is tension and distance created. When the North faces the South, they attract one another. This lesson is applied to arguments as well. If you meet loud with loud, there will be tension and a “push,” distance is created. If you meet loud with low, there’s a “pull”, and your softness and calm demeanor, will alleviate the tension. It may take a little practice, but trust me - it works!
Your turn! Tell me –what are some things you do in your relationship to bring a calm feeling into a tense situation?